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Just as quick update: last night the cast did a table read of the completed script. We didn’t find any major story or continuity issues, just a few minor typos (one was “hold crap” where it should have said “holy crap”; write your own joke there). We managed to crack each other up. I hope viewers are half as amused as we are at our own efforts.

For those just tuning in, The Damage Patrol is a web series about a group of people who reunite after 15 years to fulfill their dream of making a public access comedy show — but this time, as a web series about a group of people who reunite after 15 years to fulfill their dream… you get the idea. It’s been described as “The Big Chill, but with geeks”. It was actually triggered by me coming back to Albuquerque after being away for over a decade, getting the gang back together, and trying to make the public access show we wanted to make 15 years ago, but this time as a web series.

We started off playing it out as a game of Primetime Adventures, which gave us solid structure and a good story outline as well as some great jokes. We took the notes from those sessions and hammered it into a script.

Now we go into pre-production. We have animation to do, original music to score, props to acquire, permissions to secure to shoot at a few locations, and all of that sort of stuff.

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The complete first draft of the script is done. This Thursday the entire cast will do a table read, which will lead to some tweaks and tightening of the script, and then… then we get ready to go into production.

It’s been a long, strange trip so far, from friends reuniting in real life after a dozen years, to playing a Primetime Adventures game that was a fake reality show about our reunion, to turning the PTA game into an actual show. The script is touching, funny, and strange, and the show will be unlike anything any of us have seen before. It won’t be to everyone’s tastes, but that’s okay. We’re making it for us, and if we find an audience it’ll be with people who are as warped and geeked-out and world-weary as we are.

In a couple of weeks we’ll start casting for small roles, extras, and crew on craigslist. I’ll cross-post those listings here for those that are interested. We’re also going to be offering some select product placement opportunities to help finance production costs, mostly to rent equipment we can’t otherwise beg, borrow or, you know, borrow.

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Here is the list of episode titles. Each episode will be around 7 minutes long, so put together we’ll have a very short feature-length film.

Episode 1: We Gave Acid To A Monkey And Put Him On A Moog (aka “Pilot”)
Episode 2: Something Wonderful
Episode 3: Full Frontal Wednesday
Episode 4: Operation Latex Table Woman
Episode 5: This Actually Happened
Episode 6: Da Thang
Episode 7: It Drew Like A Crayon On The Bottom Of The Bowl
Episode 8: At The Risk Of Being Awesome
Episode 9: Where We Spent This Season’s Budget
Episode 10: At Least That’s How I Remember It

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Right now I’m basking in the glow of knowing that we’ve made it this far. Disaster has not struck, thinks have not fallen apart, we haven’t had some epiphany that we’ve all bitten off far more than we can chew. The primary difference between myself and Edward D. Wood Jr. is that Wood had some vague idea what he was doing. I freely admit that I’m making this up learning as we go along. Fortunately, I’ve surrounded myself with people who do know what they’re doing, as well as sharing my faith in this project. The joy of being a producer is that it’s basically project management; figure out what needs to be done, find the people who can do it, point them and get out of their way.

Our 10-session Primetime Adventures game is complete. My reports on that fell off because there really wasn’t anything to say. After about the 4th session we stopped using the cards and poker chips and fell into a sort of consensus, which is a very good thing. We kept all of the structure (location, focus, cast, screen presence), and worked from that. It felt like a good process for a bunch of geeks who had no idea how to create a TV show to follow, and I’ve had a couple of folks with actual film experience tell me that using our PTA-derived process was actually a pretty solid way to start. The campaign gave us an outline, from which we’re writing the actual script. We have the scenes, the beats, notes on music and props and such. We just need to fill in the dialogue and stage direction.

I like to brag that we had to reschedule a creative/PTA game session because one of our cast members was filming an episode of In Plain Sight with Fred Ward. That makes me 3 degrees from Kevin Bacon, for the record.

To keep our continuity straight, we had two post-game session where we basically did a table read of the outline, starting with the last episode and moving backward to the start. This allowed us to identify plot points we wanted to foreshadow, jokes we wanted to set up, call backs to earlier events we could insert. It’s going to make the finished thing that much tighter.

We’re heading into the scary part: the actual work. We’re nailing down lists of locations, props, costumes, music, and additional casting we need to do so we can put together a shooting schedule. Work on the animated episode has already begun, and while I still think we’re insane for being that ambitious, I’m assured that we can in fact pull it off. I’m the producer, not the animator; I have faith. Oddly, we have most of the post-production resources in place — mainly, computers and software for editing — while we’re still finalizing stuff we need to shoot, like cameras and mics and such.

This is going to be a guerrilla production, and we hope to get a lot of extras casting done via craigslist. We pay nothing, but we might be able to feed you hot dogs or peanut butter sandwiches or (on a good day) pizza. We hope to maybe get some other odd props and costumes and things that way, too. We’re getting people to buy into our vision: a bunch of people who haven’t seen each other in a dozen or more years making a web series about a bunch of people who haven’t seen each other in a dozen or more years. A show about people who have no idea how to make a show made by people who have no idea how to make a show. It’s funny, surreal, and touching, If nothing else, we’re all having a tremendous amount of fun, and the final result is going to be something we’re all intensely proud of.

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One of the central conceits of the show is that we’ve gotten the whole band back together, and it’s not true. There are a few members that simply aren’t available, or interested. We are enacting our geek mid-life crises on screen, after all, and I understand why some people wouldn’t be comfortable with that.

One person we absolutely couldn’t do this without is Johnny. In many ways, he’s the glue that holds the team together. He’s not our leader, exactly. More like our spiritual advisor. Our ombudsman. The one who keeps us all honest.

His given name, so far as we know, is Johnny Staggering Elk. Not John; Johnny. His ID says Johnny. He’s an Indian, although we don’t know if he’s Navajo, Zuni, Pueblo, or what. We’ve never asked. We assume he’s from New Mexico, although now that I think about it, there’s some evidence that he might be Canadian. He works putting up drywall, and he’s a hard worker. He also hosted a kids’ TV show, The Best Little Roadhouse In Puppetville, for a while. He’s deeply into heavy metal — the musical genre, not the movie.

In my mind, Johnny is a zen master. When things go wrong, he’ll say “bro, let’s go drywall something”. He understands that simple labor can heal the spirit and calm the mind. His last name, sadly, makes him sound like he’s a bad stereotype drunken Indian, but I’ve never known him to touch a drop. Every single one of us loves Johnny, and all of us continue to quote things he’s said over the years.

Sadly, of course, Johnny isn’t real. We just all behave as if he were.

The origins of Johnny lie with Cameron. He’s based partly on a couple of real people, including a member of an Indian heavy metal band, and a guy who kept leaving messages on Cameron’s answering machine for someone named Johnny who deperately needed drywalling done. I have no idea where his last name came from. I worry that the character might be construed as racist, but as I said before, Johnny’s wiser than all of us and Johnny always wins. We’ve run the character by a few actual indians, and they all love the guy. A couple have offered to play him.

All of us “do” Johnny. The Navajo, in particular, have a distinctive accent. We take turns speaking for Johnny, although Cameron does him the best. It’s odd to outsiders, when suddenly one of us starts channelling him, and the conversation continues with his voice moving around the room from one Patroller to another without losing his train of thought.

In the show, Johnny will be represented by a couple of running jokes (at least, in the current draft of the script; this will be subject to change, but if I have my way as producer, this is how it will go). We’ll talk about him as if he’s a real person, quote him, and explain his continued absence through dialogue. He’ll also appear, somewhere, in each episode, in a picture, as a background character in a crowd scene, something. We’ll never connect the two. We’ll never say “they guy we’re talking about in scene 4? That’s the guy standing next to the bus in scene 5.”

But now you, dear reader, have some inside knowledge. You know some of Johnny’s secrets, and you know what to look for when the show comes out.

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This is how the process is working, so far:

Once a week, the writers (who are also the main cast members) get together and play out an episode of Primetime Adaventures. We do this by the book, even though there probably won’t be “previously on” or “next time on” spots in individual episodes. Those serve to help us remember what we’ve done, and get us excited for next time.

We set things up for 10 episodes, which monkeyed with the PTA 5- or 9-episode structure. The first episode, which we treated as a pilot, had everyone with a screen presence of 2 and did not count toward the allocation of screen presence in the other 9 episodes.

As episodes are designed to be 5 to 7 minutes long (giving us about an hours’ worth of show for a future DVD release), we’re being mindful that scenes are only about a minute long. An episode will have five scenes. If we feel it runs short, we’ll insert a sixth scene. If a scene runs long and really feel like it needs to be long, we’ll cut the number of scenes to 4.

At the start of each episode, we figure out it’s overall Focus (plot or character) and Agenda (this is what needs to happen), the way you normally do for a scene in PTA. Individual scenes will have their own Focus and Agenda, but it should contribute toward fulfilling the episode’s Focus and Agenda.

As Producer, I’m also acting as scribe. I write down the Focus, Location, and Agenda of each episode, and each scene. I actually pound it out on my Alphasmart. I write questions for later (music, props, locations needed, things like that) on 3×5 cards. I don’t try to grab everything we say; I write down the “beats” of what happens, along with good jokes and bits of dialogue (if it gets someone Fan Mail, it gets documented).

A couple of days after the session, I edit my notes, clean it up, and email it out to the crew. They add notes, jokes and bits and things they thought of after the fact. We get all this together, and at the start of the next session we go over the last session’s notes.

What we end up with is a tight outline. What happens, where it happens, who’s there, some dialogue, some stage direction. Not a script, but a solid frame to build a script on.

Once we’ve played out the entire 10 episodes and have it all outlined, we’ll go over the whole thing to make sure it hangs together as one solid story. Add things that make make the episodes connect better, delete bits that don’t fit into the whole, adjust for good ideas we didn’t fall into until later episodes.

When we’re happy with the outline, then we’ll start on the real script. Each person will get assigned episodes to write, and then we’ll pass those first drafts around. If I write an episode, I’ll pass it to Dave (for example) so he can doctor it. We’ll then re-convene and go over the whole script. When we’re happy, then we move into production.

It’s as democratic a process as we can muster, and there are obvious perils to doing this by committee, but we’re all on the same wavelengths and play to each others’ strengths and compensate for each others’ weaknesses. It’s also why we’re looking at taking 3 to 4 months just to get the script. It doesn’t mean we don’t have other facets of production going on in the background, but for our first outing we figure if the script isn’t tight, we’re sunk.

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My friend Chris was in a car accident a few years ago and sustained a head injury. It wasn’t terribly serious, but it left him with memory holes. He remembers things clearly, but with odd details missing. For example, he and our friend Dave lived in the same apartment complex for a few years. He remembers that. He remembers what Dave’s place looks like, he remembers things that happened there. But he couldn’t remember which apartment was Dave’s until someone told him. He could stand outside this place he’s been hundreds of times, and not be able to tell you which door to knock on.

It was Chris who decided to put this quirk into The Damage Patrol, and into his Primetime Adventures character. It’s his eponymous character’s issue for the first season. I love him for this, because he’s willing to use his own handicap for comedy. As the PTA Producer, it’s easy conflict; Chris needs to do something, but does he remember some person, place, or thing needed to do it? Let’s draw cards and spend some Fan Mail to find out!

It’s also a great hook because beyond the laughter it makes Chris a sympathetic character. He’s self-deprecating about it, but it’s painful sometimes to watch him struggle. It hurts him when he doesn’t remember people, because he’s afraid he’ll hurt their feelings. I know it pains him when he doesn’t remember shared experiences, good times and bad times that people have gone through with him. It makes the lug that much more lovable, in real life, on screen, and in the game.

Chris’s example also also illustrates how real life can be mined for character hooks and roleplaying bits. While this example is pretty specific, it does demonstrate how disadvantages in any game system can be bent to serve story needs and develop character. Think of some quirk, frailty, or annoyance in your own life. Consider things that friends, relatives, and co-workers talk about and struggle with. They’re not just a source of extra points, they’re not just combat disadvantages, they’re roleplaying hooks. Giving characters some sort of flaw makes them more real, my sympathetic, easier to relate to and easier to cheer for. In systems that don’t have disadvantage systems, you can create a back story for a low stat, or provide descriptions for abstract concepts like losing a lot of hit points, and use those as character bits.

Illegitimi non carborundum,
Berin

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The Damage Patrol was born from a Villains & Vigilantes game I ran for some friends in the early 1990s. If you’re not familiar with V&V, it’s a first-generation roleplaying game where not only stats, but origins and superpowers, are rolled randomly. You can end up with some ridiculous and downright silly characters. I don’t remember any of the characters, and we never played again after that one session, but someone decided that the name of the team should be The Damage Patrol. The name stuck; it became the name of our circle of friends.

One of the things the  non-game, real world Damage Patrol did on a regular basis was watch movies. Mystery Science Theater 3000 was still on the air and still in the Joel years, and we’d get together on Saturday nights to watch new episodes. We’d go to movies in theaters and heckle them, out loud, and rather than get chucked out we’d get kudos from other people in the audience who laughed out loud at our antics. We were convinced we were funny, and that other people would find us funny, too.

We started putting together ideas for our own sketch comedy show. For a token fee, anyone could use the resources of the local public access stations, and we’d actually get on the air for people to see — at least, people in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Before we got it completely off the ground, we hit the perfect storm of group dissolution. Some of us got married. Some of us moved away because of our careers. Some of us got hit with personal problems. Some of us just lost momentum, or interest.

Twelve years later, I find myself back in Albuquerque, reconnecting with old friends, and the idea hit me: let’s put the band back together. Let’s do what we talked about all those years ago. Instead of doing it on public access, let’s do a web-based show. Albuquerque has become a huge film town in the intervening years, with television shows and movies being shot here every day of the year. At least one of us has actually produced a feature film. Others have done some acting, or done other jobs on set. Everyone seems to know someone who has some useful production-related skill.

After kicking around ideas we decided that just doing the old show wouldn’t work, so we’re going “meta”. It’s going to be a show about a bunch of middle-aged guys who wanted to do a public access show, who reunite years later to make a web show. It’s about being an aging geek. It’s about how lives change. It’s about why, at this point in our lives, we all have reasons we need to do this.

To bring things full circle, we’re using Primetime Adventures to help develop the script. It’s a game where you develop a fictional television show, except ours isn’t going to be fictional. We’re playing versions of ourselves, in the show and the game. We’re figuring out the overall story arc for the season, including character arcs. The game gives us the structure we need not only to get a script together, but to reconnect with each other and strengthen the bond we still share even though we haven’t been together in a dozen years.

It will be a while before you get to see an episode of the show, dear reader, but I’m going to be blogging about both the PTA game sessions and the production of the show itself. We’re all really excited about this, and I’m excited to be able to bring you along for the ride.

Illegitimi non carborundum,

Berin

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